First of the Month: April 2009

Friends, welcome to the fourth month of the Gregorian calendar: Awesome April, where the sports world has much to offer; showers and flowers combine for a grand mix; and quirky celebrations make it 30 days you don't want to miss. Welcome to the first week, where the Motor City's Ford Field will host the Men's Final Four, a field that includes the home-state Spartans of Michigan State. Just across the Midwest, the women will be playing under the arch for a title in St. Louis. And don't forget WWE's Wrestlemania 30th anniversary on Sunday night. (Yes, the Undertaker is still throwing people in coffins.) Later in the month we see the Masters golf tournament; the Detroit Lions make the first overall pick in the NFL draft; the return of the "boys of summer" as MLB opens; and the start of the NHL and NBA playoffs. April has long been known for its rain, but it also brings us the first true sign of green – not just Spartan green. April is when cherry blossoms are in full bloom and tulips come out of the ground for two consecutive days with above 70-degree weather. And finally, April brings anniversaries and holidays. This month America remembers the 10th anniversary of the Columbine shootings in Littleton, Colorado, on April 20th. (This is one of those remember when moments, and when you give thanks.) On April 18th the nation celebrates Record Store Day so go to your local shop. And not to be forgotten, today we celebrate April Fools Day.



And what would our beloved April be without birthdays? Um . . . well . . . probably a Monday morning without your cup-of-Joe? Anyway, on Friday Simon Cowell’s prodigy Leona Lewis turns 24 the same day as skier Picabo Street turns 38. On the 7th, Russell Crowe turns the big 44 exactly three days before Steven Segal “Under Sieges” into the big 57. On the14th baseball-legend-turned-baseball-crook-turned-baseball-something, Pete Rose, turns 68 one day after Max Weinberg of Conan and the E Street Band turns a decade earlier. On the 26th Master P will “Make EM Say Ugh” as he turns 38 exactly one day before NASCAR Great Michael Waltrip races into his 46th birthday the same day music legend Willie Nelson smokes to celebrate number 76.

First of the Month: March 2009

Hip-Hip-Hooray, it’s the third month in the Gregorian calendar and boy has March poured along the eastern seaboard with some surprising weather. So as everyone living from Augusta, Georgia, to Augusta, Maine looks in disbelief, I can’t help but remind you that “ March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb.” (That's right.) And in between all of that lamb, lion talk there's plenty of celebrations to make you glad that February is over. March is full of great occasions. For example, we're in the midst of Women's History Month; all week long the most populous County, Los Angeles, is calling this "no cussing week"; Sunday the 8th is daylight saving (not savings) time (remember spring forward); St Patty's Day is the 17th, one day before Megan Clark celebrates another birthday; the March Madness of NCAA's Road to the Final Four starts with the 15th’s Selection Sunday, which also is the day the American Legion was founded in 1919; and as crazy as this sounds, Spring starts on the 20th.

And what March be without birthdays? To kick off birthdays a day late let’s celebrate Jon Bon Jovi’s big 47 today, exactly eight days before Canadian director Paul Haggis of “Crash” and “Casino Royale” turns 56 on March 10th – the same day Chuck Norris kicks his way to a stellar 69. On March 16th, we celebrate Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg’s 76th birthday exactly six days before Wolf Blitzer talks about his roots in Buffalo and celebrates his 61st with Andrew Lloyd Webber, who turns the same age and will probably talk about the “Phantom of the Opera” and how he grew up in London’s Phantom area.

First of the Month: February

For those looking for some excitement in a short amount of time; February is your answer. Yep, the second month in the Gregorian calendar is jam packed from the get-go. For example, you’re probably watching the Super Bowl kickoff today as the Cardinal and Steeler fans will complement one each other before millions of viewers see Michael Scott deal with a disaster in an epic rendition of "The Office." Then we have Candlemas, better known as Groundhog's day. (If you're wondering, this is what's like to be in Punxsatawney.) But let's not forget the other gems of February like Black History month; the long three-day weekend thanks to Presidents' Day; lover’s paradise on Valentine's Day. There’s plenty of other occasions too: On the 18^th, we also celebrate the 79^th anniversary of when planet Pluto was founded; On the 24^th, Fat Tuesday invites everyone in to eat; and the 7^th is Charles Dickens Day.

And what would February be without birthdays? Tomorrow Ms. Uptown Girl Christy Brinkley turns 55 exactly three days before beating Bobby Brown turns 40. One week after Brown’s birthday Greg the “Shark” Norman turns 54 exactly one day before Sheryl Crow turns 46 and four days before Jimmy Hoffa turns 86 (Hey! He could be alive.) Five days before Hoffa’s bday, the always affable Mike Cieslak turns 33, 18 days before the Month ends and always busy actor John Turturro turns 52.

First of the Month: January

Nah Nah nah nah. Hey hey hey. Goodbye. Nah nah nah nah. Hey hey hey. Goodbye. Yep, that’s it. Bye Bye 2008. We welcome you 2009. We welcome a new kick-ass year and all the great things that come in January, the first month of the Gregorian Calendar.

This week brings great anticipation for football fans and those looking for some change. Today is one day before Trivia Day, so get those drinking cards out as you hope to be “winner winner, chicken dinner” on Wednesday nights at the local pub. And if you want a fast stat remember Jan. 21^st 23 years ago, when the supersonic airliner ‘Concorde’ began regular commercial service. On the 6^th we have Cuddle Up Days for all of you couples out there or anyone wanting a nice body pillow. We also have mainstays like the 19^th, when we celebrate MLK day; inauguration on the 20^th, when we welcome the first African American as the leader of the White House; and the 24^th, when we tip our libations to ‘beer can appreciation day.’ (BTW: This day celebrates the 1935 date when the product of barley and hops was first sold in a can. So sit back today, drink some of that Miller High Life and watch the “The Grandaddy of Them All” as another Rose Bowl is on TV. Have a great month you football fans, as it all comes to a close with the Super Bowl week.

And what January be without birthdays? Besides Dr. King on the 15^th, we have the great Stephen Stills from Crosby and Nash turning 64 today and Dave Matthews Crashing into 42 on the 9^th. On January 14^th, Teen Wolf

star turned Arrested Development actor, Jason Bateman, turns 49 the same day Dave Grohl Foo Fights his way to the same birthday celebration. And on the 28^th Mr. Frodo, Elijah Wood, turns the big 28.

First of the Month: December

"Celebrate Me Home" like a Kenny Loggins song because we are welcoming the 12th and final month of the Gregorian calendar. Yes, this is it folks, we are taking in the last few days of the year, when anything is possible.

During these next few weeks, we'll embark on a journey that'll take us into the shortest day of the year; a drunken party put on by friends, employers or both; endless hours of college football watching during the Meineke Car Care Bowl Week; and a few kisses under the mistletoe. December brings Adam Sandler to the airwaves as he celebrates the Jewish holiday of Hanukkah. It also brings Andy Williams, Sinatra and Kenny G to some soft rock radio station that turned into a Holiday cheer hotline.

This month is where we pull all the stops at Pik N Save; Kohls; Toys R Us; and any other of the stores that may have the next Beanie Baby item. (Did you forget about those little things already?) The month's birthstone is the blue turquoise, but many will be celebrating the month with a diamond. (This is big congrats to anyone that got engaged or a big sorry for anyone that was cheated on by Kobe Bryant.) The birth flower is the Holly or Poinsettia. And please don't forget to tell someone to celebrate Crimbo. It's the slang word for the holiday on December 25^th.

So what would all these pound cakes and sugar cookies be without a few birthdays of people who double-dip on the holiday spirit? Golfer Lee Trevino hits the 69 today just two days before "This is How We Do It" singer Montell Jordan turns the big 40. A full week and three days after Dick Van Duke turns 83 just four days after Mr. Bob Dylan's Wallflower Jacob turns 39. Later in the month and after baby Jesus celebrates another birthday in heaven, Jude Law takes a break from a cameo on December 19^th to turn 36 exactly two days before Donna Summer closes the month with a 60^th birthday celebration.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a great month.

First of the Month: November

Family, friends and friends of family and friends, welcome to the 11th month in the Gregorian calendar, November. This month opens up on a Saturday, which allows you to kick off with a “Craicin” time. (For those of you not up on your Irish-lingo, that’s “good” time.) And rest assured, you can forget about all those ghosts you saw last night. Yes, I’m talking about those Palins/Tina Fey look-alikes, Joe the Plumber real-lives and Barry Obama tykes. You can forget about that and take a moment to give a great “Americafyea.” You see, November is about giving your all, whether that be for voting a big yes for Democracy (which is much easier than filling out a Florida ballot); saluting those who have served with another “Americafyea” one week later and stuffing your face with, well, stuffing on the 27th. November is the month of prosperity for NFL and FBS (another stupid acronym) teams searching for titles and when Fred Couples makes his yearly paycheck at the Skin’s golf match. This month’s election day is November 4th, and yes this is a first for the first of the month – people may elect a black president or a gun slinging “maverick” from Alaska. So go out there and give it your all buster; listen to some Guns and Roses “November Rain” and pop in that sweet November film with that dude from Point Break (Yeah we’re talking about “Sweet November,” which also stars that freaky-looking “Monster” woman); and remember this Bud’s for you. (BTW, INBEV, a Belgium brewing company is buying American icon Anheuser Busch.

And what would a November be without some birthdays to be thankful for? So Mr. Lyle Lovett, happy 51^st birthday today as you recall your wedding with Julia Roberts. And Ms. Aston Kutcher, we wish you a happy 46 on November 11^th, which is six days before Bryan Adams sings another “Summer of 69” with all those Vancouver Canucks fans. On November 20^th Michael Scott’s hometown boy and Democratic VP candidate, Joseph R. Biden Jr., recalls his Scranton roots when he turns 66 exactly three days before “Just the Way it is” Bruce Hornsby turns 54. And to end this month, one of the newest “American Dads”, Clay Aiken” turns 30 the same day everyone’s real “British Idol,” Billy Idol, turn 53 as he does another “Rebel Yell.”

First of the Month: October

Boo! Cause it’s the 10th month of the Gregorian calendar, beloved October.

Never is there such a cornucopia of events in one month than this year's October. Sure you have the mainstays like Columbus Day on the second Monday, where there is some parade somewhere and a slew of protesters; beer-drinking throughout the world at an Oktoberfest; and of course Detroit's rocking Devil's Night on the 30th and Halloween the next day. But did you know today is apple crunch day, that we’re in the midst of national pizza month and that October 8th is American Tag Day? (If so, then you’re it as the new writer of this blog.)

And in the "First of The Month" we never do leave out sports, religion or politics - cause they are inseparable by some of our readers. So don't forget that fantasy football is in make-or-break it mode as your players have bye weeks and homecomings across the country 'welcome back Cotter' during their big festivities. (This is where I give my obligated NASCAR push.) Revv up those engines cause the Chase for the cup continues with Jimmy Johnson. Vroom! Vroom! And now to Religion: The big one this month is the Jewish celebration of Rosh Hashanah, which ends at nightfall tonight, and Yom Kippur, which is 8 days away. And for politics, we have exactly four weeks, six days and a few hours before the polls close for the presidential election. A lot can happen in those 34 days. Let's look at Thursday for example, Tina Fey takes on Grandpa Joe in an all crucial celebrity death debate. (Winner gets a meet-and-greet with VP Dick Cheney at a quail ranch.)

And what would October be without our birthdays? You still can't come up with a good answer can you? Well it would be a parallel to being Detroit Lions fan during the Matt Millen era. (A lack of hope and a 31-84 record. Mr. Obama can you please take over the team. You have the audacity to help restore the roar.)

So today let's take a teaspoon of sugar for "Mary Poppins," Mrs. Julie Elizabeth Andrews Wells as she turns 73 and tomorrow let's drink till we puke to the sounds of Gordon Matthew Sumner aka "Sting" blast out Roxanne on his 57th birthday. Six day later lets get down under (not that way) and eat some gator with “Crocodile Dundee” star Paul Hogan who turns 69 the same day "Chevrolet Chase" gets on the Funny Farm reunion tour for the big 65. Later in the month Doc takes us 'back to the future' (whatever that means) as he celebrates his real life 70th birthday on the 22nd, three days before Sir Patrick Yoest goes 'dancing with me' to the tunes of 'Still the One' as we celebrate the honorable John Hall's 61st birthday. And to round out this eclectic group, let’s toast again, this time to that nasty Halloween-theme jungle juice that everyone makes, and give a obligatory laugh to John Candy, who would have turned 58. Rest in Peace until November.

On another note, On Sept. 20th Mr. Benjamin Robert Mulder was born.